The final edition of the top 10 top 10s - The Events of 2010
List #7: Top 10 things we were addicted to that we shouldn't have been:
10. Assorted Celebrities of all shapes and sizes
9. Vuvuzelas
8. Snuggies, Shamwows, and all things infomercial
7. Social Networking- this means ALL of it.
6. Silly Bands
5. "The Decision"
4. Jersey Shore
3. FarmVille
2. Twilight
1. Justin Bieber
List #8: Top 10 things we should have been addicted to but weren't:
10. Zadroga Bill (and several others)
9. Our appearance - and by this I mean the way we appear to other people online. Not through pictures- strictly through comments alone.
8. Global Warming
7. The War on Terrorism
6. Urbanization and Deforestation
5. Midterms, and actually electing leaders, regardless of whatever party they belong to.
4. Cholera Outbreak in Haiti
3. The insane man in North Korea
2. The humanitarian crisis in Sudan
1. Earthquakes in Haiti and Chile
List #9: Top 10 "Oops, sorry about that world" moments from 2010:
10. Twilight producers accidentally release another movie, refuse to apologize.
9. WikiLeaks releases classified information to the public that seems to make everyone except the government pretty happy.
8. North Korea continues to act like the world's annoying little brother; the rest of the world gives Kim Jong-Il a stern lecture and tries halfheartedly to take away his water pistol.
7. Iceland's Eyjafjallajokull (volcano) erupts, causing major problems with air travel in Europe for weeks. The volcano has apologized for the eruption, but as of yet has shown no remorse for being so hard to pronounce.
6. There is currently an outbreak of cholera in Haiti. Americans, who could provide aid, conveniently forgot Haiti existed sometime in February, shortly after the earthquake.
5. Inception confuses everyone, refuses to apologize, claiming that people who watched it were merely dreaming.
4. The Earth still hasn't shown any remorse for suddenly shifting at its tectonic plate boundaries to any of its inhabitants.
3. LOST finally ends, but due to a bizarre hole in the space-time continuum, ABC will air it again starting next year, with the twist of everything going backwards.
2. The U.S. makes it past the first stage in the FIFA World Cup (soccer). Angry mobs soon form around the world and the United States, realizing its mistake, quickly loses its next match.
1. BP causes a massive oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico. Luckily, someone caught on to the fact that BP stands for "British Petroleum" and we all get to blame the British.
The Final List
List #10: 10 Things to look forward to in 2011:
10. On January 1, Apple releases a phone better than the recent Windows phone. Microsoft: "Well, that was fast."
9. FarmVille activates the next phase of their diabolical plan, turning all of its users into mindless slaves.
8. Even more politicians get their words taken out of context.
7. All earthquakes magnitude 6 or above trigger fears of "the beginning of the end."
6. Verizon/AT&T war goes nuclear
5. Kim Jong-Il still has that water pistol.
4. Inception sequel: Several dreams within several more dreams, some of which are actually real life.
3. In order to fix past problems, the 2011 Toyota Prius comes with no accelerator pedal
2. Intelligent people who (correctly) argue that the decade actually starts in 2011, not 2010, get shot by the other people who (correctly) argue that the first group of people are annoying.
1. Saying "oh-eleven" instead of "oh-ten" when abbreviating the year.
Z Has No Life will (hopefully) be back next year with (hopefully) more lists.
Happy Holidays!
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