The Top 10 Top 10s from 2010 - Part 3

The final edition of the top 10 top 10s - The Events of 2010

List #7: Top 10 things we were addicted to that we shouldn't have been:
10. Assorted Celebrities of all shapes and sizes
9. Vuvuzelas
8. Snuggies, Shamwows, and all things infomercial
7. Social Networking- this means ALL of it.
6. Silly Bands
5. "The Decision"
4. Jersey Shore
3. FarmVille
2. Twilight
1. Justin Bieber

List #8: Top 10 things we should have been addicted to but weren't:
10. Zadroga Bill (and several others)
9. Our appearance - and by this I mean the way we appear to other people online. Not through pictures- strictly through comments alone.
8. Global Warming
7. The War on Terrorism
6. Urbanization and Deforestation
5. Midterms, and actually electing leaders, regardless of whatever party they belong to.
4. Cholera Outbreak in Haiti
3. The insane man in North Korea
2. The humanitarian crisis in Sudan
1. Earthquakes in Haiti and Chile

List #9: Top 10 "Oops, sorry about that world" moments from 2010:
10. Twilight producers accidentally release another movie, refuse to apologize.

9. WikiLeaks releases classified information to the public that seems to make everyone except the government pretty happy.

8. North Korea continues to act like the world's annoying little brother; the rest of the world gives Kim Jong-Il a stern lecture and tries halfheartedly to take away his water pistol.

7. Iceland's Eyjafjallajokull (volcano) erupts, causing major problems with air travel in Europe for weeks. The volcano has apologized for the eruption, but as of yet has shown no remorse for being so hard to pronounce.

6. There is currently an outbreak of cholera in Haiti. Americans, who could provide aid, conveniently forgot Haiti existed sometime in February, shortly after the earthquake.

5. Inception confuses everyone, refuses to apologize, claiming that people who watched it were merely dreaming.

4. The Earth still hasn't shown any remorse for suddenly shifting at its tectonic plate boundaries to any of its inhabitants.

3. LOST finally ends, but due to a bizarre hole in the space-time continuum, ABC will air it again starting next year, with the twist of everything going backwards.

2. The U.S. makes it past the first stage in the FIFA World Cup (soccer). Angry mobs soon form around the world and the United States, realizing its mistake, quickly loses its next match.

1. BP causes a massive oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico. Luckily, someone caught on to the fact that BP stands for "British Petroleum" and we all get to blame the British.


The Final List

List #10: 10 Things to look forward to in 2011:
10. On January 1, Apple releases a phone better than the recent Windows phone. Microsoft: "Well, that was fast."

9. FarmVille activates the next phase of their diabolical plan, turning all of its users into mindless slaves.

8. Even more politicians get their words taken out of context.

7. All earthquakes magnitude 6 or above trigger fears of "the beginning of the end."

6. Verizon/AT&T war goes nuclear

5. Kim Jong-Il still has that water pistol.

4. Inception sequel: Several dreams within several more dreams, some of which are actually real life.

3. In order to fix past problems, the 2011 Toyota Prius comes with no accelerator pedal

2. Intelligent people who (correctly) argue that the decade actually starts in 2011, not 2010, get shot by the other people who (correctly) argue that the first group of people are annoying.

1. Saying "oh-eleven" instead of "oh-ten" when abbreviating the year.


Z Has No Life will (hopefully) be back next year with (hopefully) more lists.


Happy Holidays!

Top 10 Top 10s of 2010 - Part Two

Part Two: The People of 2010

List #4: Top 10 groups of people who made very, very bad moves.

10. Anyone who read or saw Twilight or any of its sequels. (This is self-explanatory).

9. Suzanne Collins. SPOILER ALERT! Katniss should have chosen Gale.

8. Jersey Shore. We're questioning how you're still on TV.

7. North Korea. Continuing to act like the world's annoying little brother with a water pistol, firing said water pistol at innocent South Koreans and earning themselves a timeout.

6. BP. They seemed rather crude this year.

5. NBC. You know you handled a situation poorly when you give someone millions of dollars to leave.

4. Windows and their new phone. No one is going to want to buy a phone that keeps saying "Not Responding" all the time.

3. Whoever selects the Nobel Prize winners. Forget giving him the Nobel Prize, get Liu Xiaobo out of jail!

2. Toyota. The growth of the number of problems it had with the Prius just wouldn't stop.

1. WikiLeaks. Because the government will be completely fine with it, and hail Julian Assange as a national hero.

List #5 (plus bonus list): In picture form:
A few months ago, I posted a series of interesting default search terms you would get when you typed generic questions such as "What is" or "When was" into the search engine Bing. This time, we're taking it a step further to see what we think of the people making headlines today, and Benjamin Franklin.

We came up with 25 people to try search terms on. This group was made up of politicians, celebrities, and leaders of today. And Benjamin Franklin. Here's what we typed into Bing: "[person] is _____" The top 10 most common results that came up in the blank made the list. We also came up with a bonus list of the 10 most bizarre search terms (including funny and ironic searches). Here's the list:
(click to enlarge)
Note: The footnote in the "ugly" column may be unreadable. It says: "In addition to being 'ugly', Snooki is also "really ugly"

List #6: The Top 10 people to look up to from 2010

10. Barack Obama: He makes a lot of inspirational top 10 lists around this time of year like "top 10 leaders" or "top 10 politicians" so we figured we'd better put him on this list too.

9. Rick Astley: His music videos (one in particular) are still among the most consistently watched on YouTube. How does he do it?

8. Justin Bieber: Overcame such odds to become what he is today, adored by over 350 million Americans.

7. The guy at the Drive-Thru window who took my order: You, sir, keep many people from going hungry everyday, and you work at such a modest salary as well!

6. Mark Zuckerberg: Only Julian Assange has gotten more private information onto the internet, but Zuckerberg has successfully evaded the law!

5. The Beatles: They finally did the right thing from a money standpoint, going to iTunes after everyone had already illegally downloaded their music from other places.

4. Team [insert Twilight character here]: Each team has instilled the values of cooperation and teamwork into today's preteens, something few other movies or books has been able to do before.

3. Steve Jobs: For appearing in my crossword puzzle last week under the particularly cryptic clue "Jobs in Computers". You're a tricky one, Steve.

2. Kim Jong-Il: Once again, he has proven wrong the old adage that "you can't have your cake and eat it too" by doing just that while refusing his peasants any food at all. Not since Marie Antoinette have we seen such ground-breaking achievements.

1. Jeff Miller: Miller won his third couch potato championship on January 4th of this year and set a world record by loafing around for 72 hours straight. That's three days. Three days of just sitting on a couch. He's the pride and joy of no-lifers like myself. Way to go, Jeff!

Next up: Part 3: The Events of 2010

Top 10 Top 10s from 2010 - Part One

Hello, I'm finally back after being quite busy with other things since my last post. In return, I have spent the last few days compiling the events of this past year, finally coming up with The Top 10 Top 10s from 2010. In three separate posts, I will detail 100 (not necessarily different) people, groups, and events that made 2010 unique.

List #1: Top 10 celebrities we somehow, amazingly, still care about
10. Tiger Woods
9. The Tea Party. Yes. All of them.
8. Taylor Lautner
7. Whatever Kardashian it is now
6. Paris Hilton
5. Mel Gibson
4. Lindsay Lohan
3. Justin Bieber
2. Snooki
1. Robert Pattinson

List #2: Top 10 reasons Qatar was awarded the 2022 World Cup over America
10. FIFA wants to expand where the World Cup is played
9. Doubts over the support a World Cup would get in America
8. Interesting climate in Qatar causes new, fun, challenges
7. Qatar has fewer vuvuzelas
6. Qatar starts with a Q
5. It's... America
4. Jersey Shore
3. Bill Clinton
2. Crazed Preteens may hold soccer players hostage
1. The U.S.A. has allowed Justin Bieber inside their borders, Qatar hasn't.


List #3: Top 10 things we didn't want any more of, but somehow ended up with anyway
10. Earthquakes: We got the message after Haiti, I don't think Chile was really necessary.

9. Reality TV: Because America didn't already have enough bad singers and dancers now, even more are getting to go public. Meanwhile, in the worst move of the year: Skating with the Stars.

8. Celebrities doing stupid things: Due to the underabundance of intelligence in Hollywood, we are forced to hear about these somewhat popular people doing somewhat stupid things. May karma come back to haunt them, preferably while they're driving drunk.

7. Michael Vick: While his story may be filed under "heartwarming" (I still haven't figured out exactly how) we really don't need to hear his story and have him interviewed every time his team plays a football game.

6. Movies made out of books: Once again, several fools have tried to upset the natural balance- making movies out of books- and failed. And once again, Harry Potter was really the only movie based off a book that actually followed a plot line, proving once and for all that it wasn't a series of novels, it was actually a series of screenplays.

5. The iPad: I've never used it, but a larger iPhone minus the phone just seems awkward.

4. "Villes": Zynga is going crazy with these. First it was FarmVille, then people caught on to other "villes". Now we're on to CityVille, which is the most redundant name for a game ever.

3. LeBron James: He was arrogant enough to think people would watch an hour-long special just about himself- and millions of people actually, for some reason unbeknownst to mankind, did.

2. Shrek: It was funny the first fifteen movies, now we're wondering when they'll run out of material to keep the adults mildly entertained who have been forced to watch this movie by their kids.

1. Cell Phone Commercials: Because every phone can do everything every other one can, so please, for the sake of sanity, shut up. I really couldn't care less whether your phone can cook pasta better than another brand's.

Next up: The people of 2010